Silence of the Lamb
by lov3lykiss3s
Summary: At first she was nothing, and then suddenly, she was everything. But how could he fall in love with someone more cursed and cold then he is...and how could he save the unsaveable? Kanda Yuu x OC
1. Three Months Ago

_**Chapter 0. Three Months Ago**_

**Three Months Ago...**

Her heart pounded from under the flesh of her chest, her adrenaline powered her legs as she raced through the woods into the darkness of night as her feet trampled over sticks, rocks and somehow even glass. The growing mark on her stomach reached it's way up her body, reaching her chest as she began to feel the power within her starting to grow and shift.

_It wasn't me! It coul-couldn't have been me!_

Her thoughts were repetitive and panicked as the mob behind her started to catch up.

_It should've been** him**! It should've been him! Why is it **me**?! Why?!_

Gasp. She skidded to a halt, sliding like a baseball player at the edge of a cliff, barely stopping in time before she went over the edge. Her breath was quivering as it illuminated in the air from the cold, trembling from the freezing sub zero weather and the arrow lodged in her right leg.

"SHE'S CORNERED! YOU'VE GOT NOWHERE TO GO YOU CURSED GIRL! GIVE UP NOW AND WE WILL HAVE MERCY!"

_They did this._

_They are the reason…_

_They…_

The mob surrounded her so swiftly, any other person may have been alerted and stunned with disbelief. But this girl was not even phased as her glossed over eyes stared at the cliff before her. What if she just died? If she died….it would die with her.

"I don't need your mercy…" her voice cold and stoic, rose above the crowd as they silenced. The girl straggered to her feet, turning to her captive audience. "….I need….._to die_."

No one could even blink before she let her feet slide off the edge of the cliff, falling fast and quick into the darkness of the abyss. Her pursuers stood silent, shocked and taken back by the girl's sudden leap to death.

"She's gone?!"

"No…she's escaped." The leader of the mob silenced his crowd once more. "Send notice to the Wickerthorn clan….the Hostess is on the run."

_Author_: **This will all make sense later. **  
** Read the next chapter.**


	2. Primrose Pariah

**Chapter 1. Primrose Pariah**

"UGHHHHH this is so BORRRRIIINGGG!" Lavi whined as the gang trudged onward to home. Home being that creepy building on top of the hill. Yea, the Black Order didn't exactly have a friendly, homely look to it did it? The redheaded Exorcist wasn't the only one sick and tired of this pointless walk back home. Lenalee was just beside herself that the so-called "important mission" Komui had given Allen, Lavi, Kanda, and herself proved to be nothing but a rumor. A Finder's mistake. For once, however, Kanda and Allen were on the same level of annoyance for once. Both disappointed in their stupid mission and in Lavi's whining.

"Shut up." Kanda growled at the redhead as scoffed at his unfortunate comrade.

"Lighten up, Yuu. Even you must be annoyed that all we were sent to do was NOTHING."

"STOP CALLING ME THAT!" Kanda's eye twitched at what Lavi had addressed him as he started to draw his Mugen; a tad more on edge than usual. Lenalee stood in between the two.

"Stop it you two! Let's just get home already! It's bad enough we had to walk!" she barked, but yet Lavi drew his Innocence as well.

"Good idea, Yuu! What a good way to blow off some steam!" Lavi snickered as he grinned brightly at his humor.

"DO YOU WANT TO DIE?!" Kanda rawred at him as he unsteathed Mugen.

"Allen! A little help here?!" Lenalee cried out helplessly.

"Anyone else hungrier than I am?" Allen inquired, ignoring the whole situation as his stomach growled impatiently.

"WHY ARE YOU THINKING OF FOOD NOW?!" The three others screamed at the gray-haired boy.

_Everybody's waiting. Everybody's watching. Even when you're sleeping..._  
_Keep your Eye-eyes...open..._

The gang silenced as a beautiful voice echoed through the air as the wind blew softly amongst them.

_Everybody's waiting to see you break down..._  
_everybody's watching to see the fall out..._  
_even when your sleeping, sleeping..._  
_keep your eye-eyes..._  
_open._

"Does anyone else hear that...?" Lavi asked frozen in place as the others stayed petrified.

"An akuma, maybe...?" Lenalee inquired, looking at Allen.

"Doesn't sound like an akuma...then again...I could be wrong." Allen said rubbing the back of his head inquistively.

Kanda, without a word, started to walk towards the voice. There was only one way to find out what this thing was, going after it. He didn't want to waste time like those other idiots, staring into the distance making guesses about what it could be when they could've just walked a few feet and found it themselves. Though he admitted he wasn't the most understanding being, he at least was patient when it came to dealing with them. Kanda's steps came to a halt as he caught sight of someone in the short distance ahead of him. Whoever it was, they were laying out in the middle of an open meadow, cushioned by the flowers as they seemed to be dead ...or asleep.

Cautiously, Kanda stepped forward and got only inches closer, gawking a moment that his discovery.

She looked like she had gone through one hell of a fight. She was bruised, cut up and covered in dust and dirt, probably dried mud. Her face, though dirty with her bruised cheek showing through the muck, was beautiful as it laid resting in a slumber. The bags under her closed eyes made Kanda conclude that this may have been her first sleep since God knows how long.

He moved a little closer.

Her hair was dark brown, dark almost to be black but not quite. Her skin was pale, fair though roughed up and blood stained. Her eyelashes were considerably long, and her lips softly pink. She was awfully thin and fragile looking. Harmless almost.

Who was this girl?

She wore a baggy, worn-out trenchcoat that seemed a little too masculine to belong to her. Under that, a simple black tanktop, complete with a baggy pair of pants held up by the belt on her waist. Her boots were covered in dirt...and..

Kanda moved a little closer.

He slid his finger as carefully as he could along her boot to rub off what he suspected to be dried** blood**...

...and he was right.

_Why would the bottom of her boot be covered in blood-?_

_**BAM!**_ Kanda's head flew backward as the girl threw up her leg, her foot made perfect contact with his face. He was caught completely off guard and as he fell back to the ground, he heard a distinct noise all too familiar with him. Her knives made a sound as she drew them from the holster on her thigh, and before Kanda could grab Mugen, one knife stuck straight into his shoulder and the other grazed him on the face (luckily he ducked fast enough for that one).

The girl had a look of a focused killer hunting prey as she readied her next handful of blades. Small, puny throwing knives had caused him this much anguish already?!

_Is this..Innocence?!_ He thought as the girl threw another blade, it's speed almost remarkable...and her aim quite good. She threw another and one after that, all under a second. She was incredibly fast! Kanda dashed upward and unsteathed his sword to deflect the next wave of blades. He managed to jump back enough as she reloaded her handful once more. He pulled the one blade from his shoulder and looked at it.

"It's just a damn knife! There's nothing unnatural about them-," Kanda felt lightheaded suddenly, falling to his knees as his legs went numb from under him. "Poisoned...?"

"Just enough for you to stay awake to see your death." The girl said, almost in a dazed, detached state, balancing a larger blade on her finger by the handle. She tossed it up a little and caught it by the tip on her finger. He grit his teeth as she stood only a foot away, ready to throw her last blade to end the short fight. Kanda panicked, but didn't show it.

_MOVE! MOVE! MOVE!_ Kanda gather all his energy and lunged forward tackling the girl to the ground. She growled as she struggled against him and his sudden boost of energy. He pinned one of her wrists, but the other not fast enough before she could stab him in the shoulder again with the knife clutched in her hand. Kanda finally gained control and pinned her other arm. The poisoned still coursing through his body as she kicked and struggled.

_Time to end this bit-_

As Kanda reached for Mugen, he realized something. Her eyes were closed, shut tight as if she may have been pretending this was a horrible nightmare...perhaps she was harmless...just tramatized, caught in a daze of some sort. But who cares?! She almost killed him! Why did he feel so..so..guilty?!

"Kanda, what the hell are you doing?!" Lavi's voice echoed in the raven-haired male's ears much to his annoyance. He turned his head to see the other three had finally decided to catch up. Joy.

"Thanks for coming _AFTER_ I almost got hacked to pieces!"

"Who's the girl? An akuma? She sure has a spark of fight in her like one." Lavi said, as he couldn't help noticing her struggling and kicking underneath Kanda. It was like watching an animal get out of a trap. Allen activated his eye and glanced down at the girl, and his expression softened, but drew concern.

"Kanda be careful. She's not an akuma at all...but there is something _off_...about her." Allen said, still observing the girl.

"BE CAREFUL?! SHE THROWS KNIVES AND STABBED ME TWICE!" Kanda growled rather irritated that they were siding with the female sociopath. The girl raised her leg and kicked Kanda again while he dropped his guard to yell at Allen. Almost quick enough to get away before stopped by Lavi and his hammer. She drew three blades between her fingers and aimed before Kanda grabbed her wrist.

"Miss, calm down please! We aren't going to hurt you."

The girl opened her eyes a minute and caught something in the corner of her eye as she looked at Kanda's uniform. The star...the emblem...

"Black..Order...?" She breathed the words out in a whisper, but it was audible.

"Yes, we're with the Black Order. See? No harm." The girl seemed to tear up at the words that Allen spoke and her struggling stopped as she dropped her blades to the ground. This sudden shift in mood made Kanda cautious and honestly creeped him out a little. It was like she had woken up from a bad dream.

"Help me..." She demanded breathlessly, before going limp as she passed out. Kanda caught her, and cursed under his breath as he did so. He should've let her hit the ground for trying to kill him. Lavi must've registered this frustration as he walked over and took her from him.

"I think you might throw her off a cliff or something if we let you carry her, Yuu." the redhead joked. Kanda twitched in annoyance.

"STOP CALLING ME YUU!" Kanda growled before falling face first into the ground.

Damn poisoned knives.

* * *

"Primrose...Primrose Pariah." The girl stated her namely calmly for Komui as he wrote down what she said. He was hoping by asking simple questions, the strange girl that Lavi had carried back might break her silence. It had been two weeks since she showed up here at the headquarters, and since the gatekeeper couldn't find a reason not to let her pass, she was looked after and treated medically.

"That's a pretty name. And where are you from, Primrose?" Komui continued his questionare.

"I don't remember." She answered, her eyes still cold and unfocused.

"Do you remember if you have any family? Parents? Siblings? Maybe a boyfriend or fiancee'...?"

Prim's eyes narrowed at the word boyfriend.

"I don't remember his name. I don't remember anything really.." she said lowering her head. Komui found this may have been a hopeless case. Primrose wasn't letting her guard down, even now. Whatever ordeal she had endured must have been painful and tramatizing.

"Well Primrose, I think it might be good for you to make some friends here until your memory comes back. We'll keep you busy until you're ready to leave or go home-,"

"I'm never going home..." Prim said rather sadfully, regret in her voice as she cut off the Chief. Komui felt overwhelmed by the negative energy looming off of this girl.

"Y-yes...well...um...how about you socialize a little bit hm?" Komui signaled to let Lenalee inside the office.

"Lenalee, would you mind showing Primrose around? I want her to feel comfortable here." Lenalee's face became bright and enthusiastic as she was given her task.

"Of course, Nee-san! Come on, Prim-chan!" Lenalee reached and grabbed the brunette's wrist, dragging her away much to her surprise.

"Have fun, girls!" Komui said before the door closed behind them. Bookman sighed from the corner of the room.

"This girl might be a little more dangerous than we suspected, Chief. Do you suppose she is what the Hevlaska have announced?" Bookman asked the Chief who only spun his chair in the other direction to look away from the old man.

"This girl...may hold power that even the Black Order knows nothing about. We _must_ protect her...no matter the cost."

* * *

"And this is the library! If you ever want peace and quiet you can just come and sit here! This over here is my favorite spot. Hey, Prim-chan! Do you want to see my favorite books? I've always been a fan of poetry-,"

_Does she ever shut up...?_ Primrose wondered as she listened on as Lenalee rambled on and on and on. The brunette needed an escape before she put this girl's head through a wall. Or how about one of the many people who were just staring at her like some sort of alien creature? Prim slipped away between the rows of the library and exited out a door she had no idea where it led to.

_Oh just another hallway. Whatta shocker._ The girl sighed to herself as she started walking down the hall. Flashes of memories came in and out of her mind like clips of a film as she walked through the darkness of the building.

**Death, death, so much death.**  
**Blood splattering, screaming, panic. **  
**Chaos. **  
**She's running, running fast and away as she hears a taunting voice behind her.**

_**'Run away little Rose! Run away before I kill you!'**_

**She's running as fast as she can. breathless, frightened, a sense of betrayal warping the pit of her stomach. **  
**She felt tears running down her face, and suddenly she falls on the ground with unforgiving harshness. **  
**A sword is drawn and a shadow looms over her as she hears a horrible phrase.**

_**'And so the lamb is led to the slaughter...'**_

**The blade comes down towards her, and Prim could feel the metal slicing into her as she screamed.**

Prim snapped out of the daze as a hand covered her mouth. Her golden brown eyes opened wide as she stared into the eyes of Kanda Yuu, the man she had almost ruthlessly murdered two weeks ago and hadn't seem since he left the infirmary. He didn't say anything as he stared at her stoically, but under that exterior coldness he was kind of taken back by finding her screaming in the middle of a lonely hallway. She froze, though her fingers twitched and trembled.

After a moment, he removed his hand, hoping she wouldn't start screaming again. Whatever daze she had been in was over now, but Kanda couldn't help but wonder about this little episode. As if she had momentarily relived something.

Primrose touched her face and felt it was wet from her tears, impatiently she wiped them off her face.

Realizing she was fine now, Kanda stood back up and reached a hand out toward the girl. She stared at the limb for a minute, looking from his hand to his expressionless yet aggravated face.

"_Well?_...are you going to take it or not?" He grumbled as he continued to offer his aide. Prim suspected he didn't do such a thing often and complied, reaching up and grasped his hand lightly. Kanda pulled her up to her feet and let go of her hand the minute she was balanced. He continued his walk down the hall, Prim watching his back as he walked away.

"I'm sorry." Prim said trying to smile meaningfully.

_Dammit_. Kanda was hoping she wouldn't say that. It was the reason he had done such a good job avoiding the little witch who nearly cut him to pieces. As long as that image of her standing over him with a knife in hand stayed in his mind, maybe he wouldn't be so curious about her or where she had come from. And most importantly...what the hell made her a knife-wielding wench in the first place.

Kanda didn't realize he had stopped walking and huffed before continuing.

"Hmph." Was all the dark-haired man said she he trudged on, Primrose took it as a response nonetheless.

"Primrose." She said, making him halt in his tracks once again. Kanda looked over his shoulder. "My...name.."

Was this really happening to him right now?! First she apologizes and then she tells him her name?! Why couldn't she just let him hate her guts and treat her like a hostile, rabid dog?

"Kanda." He replied quite coldly before sighing. "Come on. Follow me. I'm going to the training room."

Why did he just do that?

Primrose complied never the less, and she trailed after him quietly. Maybe it would be nice to have a quiet person around. She was much better company than Shortstack or...Lavi. Kanda's eye twitched at the very thought of that annoying moron. He looked back at her as she watched her feet as she walked. Bloodthirsty killer or frightened girl with knives?

Kanda didn't know the difference at this point.

* * *

Author;** Hoped you liked the first chapter! :3 Please review and give me feedback!**

**Song: Eyes Open by Taylor Swift **I DO NOT OWN THAT SONG. **


	3. Face Up or Face Down

**Chapter 2: Face Up or Face Down **

Prim sat in the corner of the training room with her knees pulled up to her chest, her arms wrapped around them, making a headrest for her chin as she watched Kanda nearly killed himself training. It had been, oh, like four hours now and the brunette had done little to stop him or break his concentration. Or so she thought.

Truth be told, she _did_ kind of distract him. Her careful stares, her lack of facial expression, her eyes watching with interest. Kanda didn't like how she seemed to be calculating him, observing how he moved, his weak points, or maybe even his flawed fighting. Either way, he didn't trust the little sociopath that had nearly slaughtered him in her creepy little daze.

Then again, that intrigued him.

Kanda didn't like how curious he was getting, especially that even Komui or Bookman hadn't gotten a thing from the stranger who had fallen in their hands. But it could've been that he just didn't like being intrigued or interested...in anyone. More importantly, someone with vast killer instincts.

He glanced at her and she rose her head off of her arms a moment, wondering if he was going to speak to her. Her golden eyes watched him as he went to a closet and came back out with a holster of training throwing knives. The dark-haired male tossed the holster in her direction, it landed and slid to her feet gracefully, much to her amazement.

"Throw them." He ordered, well barked was a better word. Primrose didn't argue, not like she didn't mind or anything. The brunette stood up and rolled up her sleeves til her wrists were visible. She strapped the holster to her thigh and looked for a target. Kanda noticed her intentions and saw an abandoned cup of water on a high shelf.

"Up there." He said pointing to the cup with a slight smirk. He wasn't doubting, he knew she could hit it without any trouble...it was the way she moved that he wanted to see.

Prim nodded, not speaking a word when she drew a single knife and before he could blink, the cup shattered. The hit had been so intense, so fast and full of power that the cup had shattered into something short of dust. Primrose looked at Kanda, wondering if he had gotten whatever it was out of her throwing a knife. He seemed unsatisfied and he stood upright, looking at a punching bag hanging from a chain. Their eyes met a moment, but he looked away quickly, pointing to the punching bag.

Primrose figured his intentions quickly, and decided to give him a show.

She steadied two knives on each hand and threw them one at a time under five seconds. The first hit the top of the punching bag, the second dead center, and the third on the bottom. The fourth went right through the chain, sending the bag crashing to the ground with a thud. Kanda went to tell her the next target when a blade slammed into the wall just beside his face. He looked back at Prim and they both stared a minute calculating each other a moment.

"I throw my energy into every throw, it makes the knife go faster and it lands-,"

"You never throw to injure." Kanda pointed out sharply as Prim started to explain her technique. The brunette froze, her eyes wide and then narrowed. He used his arm to push off the wall where he had been standing and pulled the knife from it. The blade had compacted on contact due to the force it had been thrown with. The end of it completely smashed and squished. "You always aim to _kill_. And to kill _quickly_."

"Your point?" Primrose asked, pushing her hair from her face as she nervously watched him walking towards her with the destroyed knife.

"Two weeks ago, you threw three knives at me, not one fatally aimed to kill me. You even said that you wanted me to see my death, but I don't think you were talking to me at all." Kanda said stopping just inches away from the girl who's hands were trembling and twitching with what? Rage? Fear? Nervousness? Anxiety? "Why didn't you kill me with your first knife?"

Primrose stared at him for several seconds, holding her breath before inhaling deeply as she whipped around and dashed for the doors out of the training room, but Kanda's strong hand caught her arm. He spun her around and grasped her shoulders.

"Look, we can't help you if we don't know a thing about you. So start talking."

Kanda blinked and his cold expression turned to regretful as her eyes looked down, cold and distant. He eased off his grip on her shoulders. Some other Exorcists came into the training room, immediately staring at the two with shocked, questionable eyes. Damn, now he was never going to get her to speak up. Then again, what did he care? Had he become so curios and intrigued that he had actually wanted to talk to someone? Kanda went to speak to her again but when he looked up she was gone. Dang she was fast, and clever...too clever for her own good. Frustrated, Kanda scoffed and grabbed his Mugen before exiting himself.

* * *

"Oh there you are, Primy." Lavi enthusiastically cheered as he climbed out of the girl's bedroom window to shimmy over next to her on the roof space. She only glanced at him before turning her attention back to the view of the world around them. The redhead shivered at the cold, wondering why in hell's fury she was sitting out in this harsh winter weather. But from the look in her eyes, it seemed that she wasn't worried about freezing to death at all. "Sooo...whatcha doing up here all by yourself? You gave Lenalee quite a scare when you disappeared on her."

The brunette didn't answer. She instead shrugged her shoulders and then looked at him with a sour face. Why did these people insist on being near her all the time? As far as she could remember, not many people wanted to be close to her, let alone her _friend_.

Lavi must've been reading minds like usual, because he softened his tone a bit.

"You know, it's not a bad thing to have friends. I don't know what happened to you before, but you can't be a loner forever, ya know? That might get lonely for you." Lavi said watching her a moment. Primrose stood up, taking a deep breath before a flash of memory hit her again.

**A cliff.**  
**Nothing in it but darkness.**  
**People shouting. Angry. **  
**Her legs going limp by her will.**  
**Falling...**  
**Falling backwards as she looked into the night sky. **  
**Unknowing when the moment of her death may come. **

"Primy?_ Helloooo_?" Lavi shook her shoulder gently as her golden eyes opened.

"If you were gonna jump off a cliff...which way would you be facing?" her question threw Lavi off quite a bit. He scratched his head a minute.

"Does it really matter Primy? I mean you'll die either way if you did that...right?" Lavi gulped as he looked at her, now nervous.

"Would you rather fall face first? Knowing the moment of your death, knowing that this second is the end of your life?" Prim inched closer to the edge, much to Lavi's horror. "Or would fall facing up? Looking at the sky, let your death come like a surprise as you enjoy your last moments?"

"Primy, you're scaring me! Why are you asking such awful questions?" Lavi said stancing to catch her if she really did jump off the roof.

"Because the first time I jumped...I fell facing up." Primrose looked at Lavi, her face stained by a single tear that had fallen from her eye. "_And I didn't die_."

Silence fell between the two as Primrose and Lavi stood on that rooftop. Her feet so dangerous close to the edge.

"I should've _died_..." Primrose confessed, even Lavi felt his patience slip away. What exactly was she trying to admit anyway?

"But you didn't." Primrose gasped as Kanda's voice broke through the atmosphere. He was sitting on the rooftop just beside the one she was on. His eyes turned to her, trying to pretend that he hadn't been sitting here all night making sure the girl didn't commit suicide. Not that he ever went out of way before, but this was a completely different situation. At least that's what he was telling himself. Kanda stood upright and faced Primrose. "The question is...why were you even _trying_ to die in the first place?"

Prim's eyes went wide, her tear flow stopped and her lips trembled as she tried to think of some reason. But her blank mind didn't have one.

"I don't remember..." was all the girl could confess. "All I know is...that I should've jumped face first."

"Why?" Kanda inquired demandingly. Primrose looked up at him and smiled softly, her face tear stained and her gaze for once, vivid and focused. Like she had woken up from a long nightmare.

"Because then I would've known for sure...that that second was my _death_." Prim finished her explanation with grace and in such a detached way that even Lavi seemed unable to process the information he just learned. The girl finally rubbed her arms, shivering at the cold and Lavi being gentleman-like went to remove his coat to give to her but found something **alot** more surprising when he didn't. Kanda had tossed his jacket to her already, much to the redhead and Prim's shock.

"Well you're still alive. So just live for now. We'll help you figure out what happened to you in time." Kanda ordered more than said. Prim nodded though anyway, wrapped in the warmth of his jacket. "Now let's go inside, it's too damn cold out here."

Lavi watched as Primrose walked over to the window and slid back into the safety of her room. His attention immediately fell on Kanda as his eyes narrowed. Kanda felt the stare and only made a face when he found Lavi just staring at him.

"_What?_" He asked, not really meaning to. But Lavi wouldn't fail to follow up with the demand.

"That's what I don't get. What just happened? Normally you would have a grudge the size of planet earth against someone who only** speaks** against you, especially someone who almost **killed** you." Lavi stood closer to Kanda observing him. "Are you _really_ Yuu?"

"How. Many. Times. Have. I . Told. You. To. Not. Call. Me. **_THAT_**?!"

"_OH yeah_, it's you, _Yuu_." The redhead snickered running back into the window as quick as he could manage before Kanda killed him. He went to tell Primy to run, but found her curled up in her bed, Kanda's jacket wrapped around her like a blanket as she slept soundly. Kanda follwoed the redhead inside and his eyes fell upon the sight of a pretty young lady sleeping in peace with his jacket. "Eh, looks like you're out of a jacket...should we wake her up...? It's only five o'clock."

Kanda's stomach knotted up, the feeling was new and strange to him, but he didn't want to admit that he was actually feeling something aside apathy. He huffed and shook his head.

"She can keep it for now." Kanda grunted as he quietly exited the room as fast as he could, leaving Lavi awestruck, but he followed him out nonetheless.

* * *

Kanda reached his room and as he shut the door behind him, he set his back against it. He threw his head backward, leaning it against the door as he thought a minute. This feeling in the pit of his stomach hadn't gone away since he had seen Primrose snuggled up in his jacket. His heart pounded underneath his chest and in all the years and battles he had fought, he felt more afraid than ever. The dark-haired male slid down his door until he was sitting on the floor, lost in thought as he looked out his window at the sun setting.

_"I should've **died**." _That's what Primrose had said...that she should've died...

"Yeah...me too." Kanda whispered under his breath as he too started to close his eyes and sleep.  
And for once, he didn't dream of that woman who so haunted him...he dreamt of primroses...


	4. Darkness and Demeanors

**Chapter 3. Darkness & Demeanors**

_I need to get ahold of myself._ This is the only thing Kanda was telling himself as he slipped on his uniform with aggravated haste (of course minus his jacket, which was gracefully stolen by Prim the night before). His dreams had been plagued with nothing but images of that wretched girl all night; Primrose...and primroses. I've never let my emotions control me, and hell if I start letting them now. This curiosity ends now.

He nodded to himself in the mirror as he continued getting dressed, satisfied with his decision, but he knew this would be much easier said and done. The antisocial exorcist had not let himself become so moved by someone else, especially someone as mysterious and as...dangerous...as Primrose. How could he have let himself slip if only for a little? She might get in his way or worse...attached. He couldn't afford such a distraction if he ever hoped to accomplish his own goals. Besides that, Prim was far too traumatized and fragile for someone like him to be getting close to. Why was he even struggling with this in the first place?

_I don't even know this girl! I don't know anything about her and here I am, all disgruntled like a lovestruck teenage girl!_ This was just unacceptable in Kanda Yuu's mind as he huffed with a soulless, cold expression that resembled his normal personality. But for once, Kanda realized he didn't like being so...so...

...alone.

A sigh broke from his lips as his scowl turned into a simple, discontent frown.

This wasn't going to be easy.

* * *

**Have you ever been in darkness so pitch black that you couldn't even see your own hand infront of her face. Even if your squinting so hard to even make out it's shape and still...you see nothing? It's a feeling of lost existence, as if you had disappeared into the dark and you would never know the light of day again. Prim set aside her thoughts for a minute as she felt around as she walked. A knife was grasped tight as she crept quietly through the woods, not even the moon was out to light her path. The beat of her heart was so rapid that she thought she may die of cardiac arrest, her mind paranoid at the sound of each snapping twig, and her fear building as she listened and walked. Even though it didn't fit the image of a burning lake of furious flames, Primrose was sure that this was Hell. **

**She stopped a minute when she felt a tree in front of her, sitting for a moment to breath. Her eyes, though blind in the dark, were gazing everywhere in the blackness. **

**Where did he go..?**

**Why wasn't he there beside her? **

**Why did he leave her alone here...?**

**Why were they made to do this in the first place...?**

**There were no answers to any of Prim's questions, and she knew it. She only could hope for one thing... that_ he_ was still alive. **

**Day one: Four deaths. **

**Day two: Ten deaths, one suicide. **

**Day three: Two deaths. **

**It was day four now. Had it only been four days? God this was grueling.**

Primrose's eyes flew open wide as the sunlight crept into her room from the window. A dream...it was only a dream. She only groaned and rolled over in her bed, readjusting to block the light from her sleepy eyes when she noticed what exactly it was that was sheltering her as a warm blanket. She sat up in surprise, batting her now awake eyelashes at the uniform coat that she held up in front of herself; staring at it awestruck. Where did she get this?

_Kanda. Oh God! I fell asleep with this thing! He's probably PISSED!_ Primrose panicked inside her head as she jumped up from bed.

The brunette stopped a minute when she saw the outside. It was morning. Light. The sun...

Primrose stepped toward the curtain and closed it quickly as she recalled her dream. The dream of being alone in the dark, watching for death but striving to stay alive so she might see the face of someone very dear to her. If only once more.

Yet her memory was still vague, still far away and ungraspable. Prim thought perhaps she may never remember everything that happened to her. Why she was afraid of the light, why she didn't like friendly conversation, why she felt nauseous whenever someone wanted to give her a hug or sit beside her.

Why she hated what Lavi had said about friends.

Prim looked at Kanda's jacket and huffed out a sigh as she came back from her dark, depressing thoughts.

She slipped out of her room with ease, quietly creeping around the hallway as to not awaken anyone who might be slumbering. She knew the dark-haired exorcist would be awake by now but didn't have the slightest clue as to where he might-

The jacket was snatched from her hands, setting the brunette back for a second as Kanda walked past her, slipping the retrieved coat on. Primrose blinked wide-eyed, almost worried by the coldness of his actions. He was far more mad than she expected he would be over the coat and silently watched as he walked quickly down the hall and vanished as he turned the corner to go to the cafeteria. What just happened? Was he angry? Did she do or say something to offend him last night? Prim didn't like this, but she didn't know why. It wasn't like she and Kanda were close or even friends. His unusual coldness toward her was just...strange. Just yesterday he was asking her questions, letting her watch him train, lending her jackets. Today...it was as if she never existed. This sense of abandonment hurt her in ways she didn't understand, ways she didn't like at all.

_Did I dream up yesterday...? No, couldn't have. How would I have ended up with the coat if I had?_

"Ah, Primy! You're up early today." Once again her thoughts were interupted as Lavi and Allen approached her from the other end of the hall. The brunette, still confused by Kanda's demeanor, only nodded to the two as they stopped a little ways from her.

"Well since you're up, want to get some breakfast with us?" Allen's invitation proved to be too much for Prim to process. She had other things on her mind.

**_"You know, it's not a bad thing to have__ friends..." _**That's what Lavi had said the night before and for some reason, Prim felt that perhaps he was right.

"Lavi, can I talk to you for a minute?" Lavi thought he was hallucinating, but it sounded like Primrose said something _normal_. No faraway look in her eyes, no state of apathy or detachment. That and she had asked to actually_ talk_ to him. The redhead finally nodded.

"Uh, sure. Allen go ahead, we'll catch up." the gray-haired male only nodded and walked offward in a state of utter bewilderment. When Prim saw he disappeared around the corner she turned back to Lavi who was just beside himself. "So what's up, Primy?"

"I want to go camping for a few days." Prim's demand left Lavi a little speechless at first as he rose his brow in confusion.

"Uh, okay, why the sudden urge to take a trip?"

"I think...it might jog my memory." Primrose explained as best as she could, not very used to telling people specifics. Or talking in general. "But I know Komui-san won't let me go alone. Will you take me?"

Now Lavi felt he might have a stroke. He rubbed the back of his head with a nervous grin.

"I don't know Primy. The Chief may not like the idea, but hey he might go for it if you think you'll remember something. I'll ask for you, alright?" Lavi smiled with honest sincerity, but Primrose was still doubtful and suspected he might not at all do her the favor. She knew, however, she was asking alot from him. After all, Komui had his reasons for keeping her cooped up.

"Soon?" She asked, her big golden eyes blinking at him like a hopeful child craving security.

"Yea, of course." Lavi responded, his next move was daring, but he proceeded to ruffle her hair on the top of her head. "Don't worry, I'll keep my word. I promise."

Prim's eyes widened.

_**"..I promise, Primrose..."**_

**His strong, but gentle hand on her head, his fingers in her hair.**

**Those blue eyes, that midnight black hair, that soft, warm smile. **

**Even though bloodstained, she knew his face didn't lie. **

**At least, he didn't before. Before...**

**...he tried to..._kill_ her.**

**She could almost feel the shift in his grip as his fingers locked on her hair and her jerked her head back. **

**A single arrow gripped in his hand, risen.**

**Jaspen...**

Primrose threw her fist and nailed Lavi in the nose as she suddenly found herself alerted and panicked. Lavi yelped and held his nose as a little blood ran from it. He was taken a bit off guard by Prim's sudden attack, but he noticed that she had snapped out of whatever had momentarily come over her. She had her hand over her mouth and she was trembling a little.

"I'm sorry..." before Lavi could comfort her, Primrose had dashed down the hallway disappearing from his sight. Even though she could hear him yelling for her, she kept running, not even sure where she had run to.

Jaspen Jadestone.

Her fiancee'.

_Arranged_ fiancee'.

He tried to kill her, but why? Why?!

Primrose felt someone grab her by the arms as she came to a screeching halt, falling still as she peered up to look at Kanda. God how she hated always running into him whenever she got these little glimpses of her past. Why couldn't she run into someone more comforting, more caring? But this was different this time, he didn't have any expression on his face, he was just staring at her like he was extremely pissed off. Kanda sighed and moved her aside before he continued on his way. Prim's previous thoughts about her flashback had faded when she became suddenly irritated with the colder than usual apathetic attitude Kanda was giving her. What had she done to deserve such treatment?

Kanda looked back at her as he had stopped walking, Prim had not even realized she had grabbed his sleeve, detaining him. She blinked, wondering what to say, or even if she wanted to say anything at all. Truthfully, now she wished it was him she had hit.

"What?" Kanda broke the silence with his harsh, hasty question, though it was rhetorical. Prim made a face before letting go and walking away.

Though it had been what he wanted, Kanda felt his heart ache as he watched her walk away. He hated that he had to admit it to himself, but his quest to not getting attached was futile. He was already too involved with Primrose. One day alone had been too much for him to take. Kanda had never given anyone but two minutes of attention before proceeding to his own business, but Primrose had mesmerized him.

He almost jumped when Lavi's hand came down on his shoulder, the redhead huffing and puffing as if he'd been running around for a while. Kanda took notice of the blood on Lavi's face, but the idiot was still smiling and cheerful as freaking ever, annoying the dark-haired man.

"Hey Yuu, have you seen Primy anywhere?" This girl haunts me.

"What the hell happened to you?" Kanda dodged the question as he shrugged his shoulder from Lavi's grip. The redhead also took notice that Kanda was in a much more sour mood than usual, peeking his interest to poke around his comrade.

"Oh the nose? Not a big deal, I think Primy remembered something and she punched me in the face. You know, another one of her little episodes. But anyway, have you seen her around? I wanna make sure she's alright."

"She ran by a minute ago. I'll find her." Kanda said, his eyes closed as he crossed his arms across his chest. He seemed to trying to keep up his usual demeanor, but he was failing. "Go wash your damn face. You look pathetic."

_One: He didn't get mad when I called him Yuu. I don't think he even noticed._  
_Two:He's gonna go out of his way to do something for me?_  
_Three: Go wash my face?_

_Yuu, your guard is wayyyyyyyyy down._

"Ah, alright, thanks, Yuu." Lavi said punching Kanda's shoulder playfully as he walked away. This was the last test, and Kanda failed. He didn't mutter a word against what Lavi had addressed him, even though he emphasized it quite plainly. He glanced back and saw Kanda was walking down the hall in an abrupt, quick pace as if he actually was anxious to see Primy.

_Kanda Yuu...Do you actually** like** someone...?_ Lavi smirked as his thoughts completed. Perhaps he might alter Primy's camping trip just a little bit. The suspense was killing him.

* * *

Crap! Prim cursed in her head as her pencil broke for the twentieth time. Her little chat with Bookman had comforted her a little bit and his suggestion as to what to do with these pieces of memory had been so simple but genius: write them down. Duh, of course! Primrose nearly slapped herself when he even mentioned the idea, wondering how she didn't think to do it before. She wrote down names, details of the places she remembered, and how she felt at certain instances of the flashbacks. Most of time she was scared. Scared and alone.

Her concentration broke completely when she heard a knock on her door.

Lavi? Prim hoped not, she still felt really bad about hitting him and even though Bookman said that the redhead probably wasn't upset at all, she still felt terrible. She slipped on a baggy sweater over her tank top and leggings before answering the door.

The last face she had expected to come knocking on her door was that of Kanda's. Primrose went into shock for about four seconds then slipped into more of a huffy state. After her last encounter with Kanda a few hours before, she really didn't feel like seeing him. Kanda picked up on her vibe and honestly he didn't blame her. When he didn't speak Prim went to shut the door but Kanda's strong arm stopped it.

"I'm sorry."

...

..._What_?

**"Is he cold like that to everyone or did I make him mad?" Primrose watched as Bookman simply smiled at her worrisome expression as he handed her a cup of tea. **

**"Kanda has never been a social person. His past is complicated and he's never shown interest or attachment to anyone. It's just his nature." Bookman sipped at his tea. "However, I've never heard of him being as gentle as you say he was with you. I think it's something you might encourage of him if it continues."**

**"I don't think it will, he seemed really upset with me." the brunette admitted regretfully. **

**"And you seemed like you were never going to talk, but here we are now." Primrose smiled a little at Bookman's final comment as she finished her tea. **

"Ah, it's..um...fine." Primrose finally responded and Kanda seemed to silently breath in relief. The two stood there awkwardly silent for a moment or two before Kanda spoke again, choking on his next words with annoyance and ultimately hiding his new found caring emotions.

"Oh and, Lavi was looking for you." Kanda huffed, leaning on the door frame with his arms crossed as he looked at her as expressionless as possible, still giving off a cold exterior. Prim didn't mind it though, finding that perhaps Bookman was right; it was simply in Kanda's nature to seem stale and passionless. "What happened?"

Despite Primrose questioning why Kanda suddenly seemed so talkative, she sighed and bashfully looked down at her bare feet.

"Uh, well, I punched him. I didn't mean too though! I, um, was asking about camping and then I remembered something and just reacted to it-,"

"_Camping_?" Camping. Alone. With Lavi? Kanda felt the sudden urge to kill something with his Mugen, but he listened patiently to Primrose's explanation, granted if she had one. She looked up at him smiling just slightly.

"Oh yea, I just wanted to get away for a while. But I don't think Lavi would want to go anywhere with me after today, and Komui may not even let me out of here anyway." Primrose said as a sense of sadness seemed to come over her. Even as he maintained his typical antisocial persona, he felt bad for Prim. It hadn't even occured to him that Prim really had been cooped up here at the headquarters, it was probably driving her crazy. Crazy enough to go camping with that moron, Lavi.

"I have an idea. I'll come get you in the morning so be ready." Kanda grunted the statement as he started to walk off.

Primrose gazed at the exorcist as he walked away, wonderstruck by his sudden, but well received invitation. Kanda was taking her somewhere?

Prim never had a more sleepless night.

* * *

"WHERE IS SHE?!" A burly, rugged man question for the fourth time to the investigator they had hired to track down their new Hostess. When the scrawny, frightened detective didn't answer, the man stepped forward and stabbed him through the chest with a knight's sword. The other two investigators dazed in terror as he withdrew the blade, swiftly swinging to to behead the already dead man. He picked up the corpse head from the ground and held it in their faces as they quivered with fear. "You're both fired. Get out of my sight!"

As the men ran for their lives, wailing and crying, the man turned to his right hand.

"I didn't want to resort to this...but I have no choice. Contact the Noah Clan.._.immediately_."

* * *

Author; **Sorry for the longness! o_o Hope it wasn't overwhelming! Aki-chan, thank you for your reviews! I hope I have pleased you! I'm trying my best to keep Kanda in character so I apologize if he's far off :( There's a huge plot twist in the next chapter so please be prepared. **


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